My Best Singing Voice Was Good Enough

Way back when I first started at the assisted living home, there was one resident that was evil.  I had never experienced anything like her before. Sure, I'd gone through life with a feeling if someone didn't like me. But, such hatred and evil directed right at me, it threw me off.

One of the reasons she bothered me so much was because, after being a mom of 4 kids and much more children experience than senior citizen experience, I tried to "retrain" her. I tried to "teach" her how to treat people. You know when they tell you to never lose a battle of wills with a child? I tried to place that same logic with this woman.

Needless to say, it didn't work. I finally came up with a coping mechanism the enabled me to give her good quality care and in the end, I became one of her favorite aides. I will not go as far as to say she became one of my favorite residents because this isn't a Disney film. But, life became MUCH easier (Not kidding. My sleepless nights and upset tummy  disappeared.) once I started doing this simple thing.

I sang.

At first, I just hummed. I would think of a favorite hymn and hum it. It calmed my spirit and soothed my soul. She never noticed. But, things got much more tolerable once I started doing that, even before I stepped into her room.

I noticed I started doing it in other residents rooms. Not because they stressed me out but just because it was already in my head and I enjoyed the peace it gave me.

One day, my absolute favorite resident of all time, Dwight, noticed I was humming. Now, Dwight was a stroke victim and while he could talk, sometimes his words didn't match what he was thinking.
"I need help with my shoes" would come out "I want pancakes". Something totally random. You were left trying to guess what he really wanted (although, pancakes could've been a real possibility).

He and I clicked right away. I could somewhat predict what he was going to need therefore eliminating his embarrassment when he couldn't express himself correctly.

When he noticed my humming, as we were walking to dinner, he stopped, looked me and said "You're singing! I like that song!" and his face was so full of joy.
He asked me to sing with him.

I didn't want to!! I am not a singer. Not even in the shower. Perhaps, when I'm alone in the van, but I stress--ALONE!

But, his face. I couldn't turn him down. So, we sang on the way down to dinner.

Are you washed in the blood,
In the soul cleansing blood of the Lamb?
Are your garments spotless? Are they white as snow?
Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb? 

And, the man that couldn't tell anyone that he needed to use the restroom, could sing the words to one of his favorite songs word for word, right on key. 

Dwight passed away a year and a half ago. The first time we sang that hymn in church, after his passing, I had to leave the sanctuary as I was crying too hard. 

It's been two years since I started at the assisted living home (with a few months "off"), I've created the habit of singing, or humming, very quietly, when I'm assisting residents with what many would look at as unpleasant chores. Showering a resident. Cleaning a bed after an accident. Swabbing the mouth of a hospice patient. 

Sometimes, the resident will catch me and sing along. Sometimes, they are so hard of hearing, they don't even know I'm doing it. But, that's okay. 

Recently, we had a lady fall and hit her head. She actually required several staples in the back of her head. It was quite the ordeal. Normally, she was a spirited "cool" old lady. You know those old ladies that wear the bright colored Nikes and have their finger nails painted bright blue? She is one of those. 
But, the day after her accident happened, she was far from herself. 
I was her aide that day. I checked on her often through the day. She slept so peacefully in her chair, I didn't wake her. 
Until, it got to be late enough in the day and I knew she hadn't eaten, nor used the rest room. 
I gently woke her and explained that we needed to get her up and move around a bit. Eat and use the restroom. 
She stated that she hadn't slept that good for a long time! But, she was so dismayed when she noticed she had wet herself. 
I explained it wasn't a big deal, her body needed the rest more than it needed the bathroom. I'd get her cleaned up and help her eat dinner. No biggie. 

She was so upset, she could not get over it. 
I started to sing as I cleaned her up, got out new clothes for her. 

Lord, lift me up and let me stand,
By faith, on Heaven’s tableland,
A higher plane than I have found;Lord, plant my feet on higher ground.

She stopped her crying, looked at me and asked "What are you singing? I haven't heard that song in so long! Please sing to me." 

I admit, I was embarrassed. Singing with someone was very different than singing to someone. 
But, we were alone in her room. She was upset. And, I love her. 

I sang to her. After, she let me get her dressed, never again bringing up her dismay over the wet clothes.  She let me get her cleaned and redressed. I continued to sing to her as I pulled her bed apart and helped her in. 

I made sure she knew where her call cord was, and that she had enough light on in her room, to see if she needed to get up. 

Told her I loved her and that I'd see her tomorrow. 

I do not sing well.  I'm probably tone deaf.  I don't even know all the words to the song, sometimes.  
But, apparently, sometimes, it doesn't matter. 

I believe if you do something with love, it will be good enough.  

Hi-Ho, Back I Go

This is my third attempt at this post.

First, I went into too much detail about my husband's job and the crappy pay, but that made him sound pathetic and that is the LAST thing I want to do. He works hard, his job just doesn't pay well.

Then, I went in too much detail about our bills. We have some, not as many as some people, but we do have them. But, really? Its not important what we pay to whom.

The bottom line is: We poor. Four children and a mortgage will do that to ya.

I  quit working at the assisted living home in Oct of last  year, not because we were so rich but because of management and schedules and my income was "cushion".

Since then, I've actually been going in and volunteering. Basically, I was doing many of the things I did when I was employed there, for free. Yup. For. Free.

I can't really put in words what draws me to taking care of the elderly. But, I am thankful that my past job helped me discover a gift I didn't know I had.

Volunteering gave me the best of both worlds--I could choose when I went and for how long, I got to love on my residents and my kids didn't have to miss me, I often times took one or two kids with me.

Meanwhile, management changed and ex co-workers started messaging me that I could probably come back and get my desired part time schedule.
Meanwhile, our mortgage went up by $300 (long story!!) and our kids kept growing and eating everything in sight.

My husband and I decided we needed extra income. I answered a Craigslist ad for a helper two times a week. Turns out, it was a 65 year old man with dementia. Both of which I have experience with but this would've been me and him alone, in his home. My husband, and myself, were not comfortable with that.

I filled out a few other applications at other facilities, with no responses.

We finally decided perhaps I would give my old facility a second chance.

I went in, asked for the (new) manager. I asked her for an employment app, explaining that I had worked there in the recent past.
She told me they weren't really hiring but I could fill out an app and they'd keep it on file.
Feeling very discouraged, I filled it out there, sitting in the lobby, getting interrupted by passing residents that wanted to chit-chat.
Finally I had filled it all out and walked it back to the manager. She looked at it.


She gave a "Whoop!!" and exclaimed "You're THAT Jackie?!"
When I said "Ummmmm...yes?" , she quickly explained they could rush my background check and when did I want to start?

I admit, it felt wonderful after being turned down other places.

It felt even better when I started, a week later, and upon entering residents' rooms, in obviously not volunteer uniform, there were many more "Whoops!! " and open arms. To say I was welcomed back would be an understatement. It made my heart swell.


However, it felt horrible, so horrible, to tell my kids I was going back to work. They cried. I cried. Their dad and I both felt like we had let them down.

But, it's only a couple days a week. And frankly, MY parents both worked. My husband's parents worked. And, we survived. No, it's not our ideal plan. But, eating and electricity are sorta important.

And, I enjoy it. So, even when we get "caught up" (hahahahahaha! Ever??) I will still probably work in some sort of caregiving position. Hopefully, my children will not be resentful.

Hopefully they will be proud.

There's Nothing Wrong With A Little Guilt (very long post)

Last post, I mentioned that something happened, concerning my oldest, this summer that was pretty major.

If you can remember your teenage years, I'm sure you'd remember that your friends were like family. They were included in most every day of your life. And, if you were lucky, they blended in to your family and were accepted and loved by your parents. If you were twice lucky, your friend's parents felt the same about you.

Jayce has such a friend, Titus.  They are close. We love Titus, he is here most days, kicking back on the couch, eating our food, messing up our house. Just like our other kids. When Titus is not here, Jayce is over at his house, eating their food and messing up their house.

Titus is 18 and will be heading off to college in California in September. He will be missed.
I also have an 18 year old nephew, Derek. Who will be heading to college in Portland. Obviously, I've known Derek all his life and besides literally being a member of our family, he's blends in with Jayce and Titus quite well. They all have a great time together.

The last few summers, all three boys have gone to Florence to go sandboarding. Florence is about an hour and half away, nearest town on the Oregon coast.  Sandboarding is sort of like surfing, but on (you guessed it!) sand.  You take the board and climb, climb, climb the sand dune and surf down. Tons of fun but very exhausting.

The last time the boys went, Titus' mom, Lisa, took them. Which was totally uncool and lame. Nobody wants to have an epic day sandboarding with their mom. Dude.

This year, they began planning their last trip, before the college boys are officially grown up, months in advance.  I admit, one of my weakest areas of parenting is agreeing to something because the actual event is so far in the future, I'm thinking that it will never happen.  And, then, it does happen and I say "No" but I've already said "Yes" months ago and feel total guilt for taking my word back.

Now, the road between our town and Florence is crazy busy in the summer. There are always accidents. And, not just fender benders.  There is at least one death on the road each summer. More in the winter, I believe.
So, when approached with their plan, which was Derek driving Jayce and Titus to Florence and sandboarding all day and eating dinner and driving home, I hesitantly agreed but only because Titus' mom, Lisa was okay with it.  Now, I believe that each parent has that one fear. The one thing they always freak out about and it hinders their thought process.  For others, it may be choking. Or, illness or bike riding. The one thing that they will always be a little more paranoid about. For Lisa, it's swimming. She is hyper paranoid any time her kids are near water.  For me? It's traffic accidents.  I am the mother that's always saying "Call me when you get there!!" and "Call me when you're leaving!" and "Be careful on the road. There are crazy drivers out there!!". And, my kid doesn't even have his drivers license yet!
Me agreeing to an inexperienced teenager driving my son and his friend to a distant town on a crazy road was not easy. But, I do have to let go at some point, right?

No. No, I don't!   Titus and Derek may be 18 but Jayce is only 15.  I don't have to let go yet.
And, after conversing with Lisa and finding out she was hesitant as well, we changed the boys' plans, like loser mothers we are.
Lisa would keep my three younger kids, I would drive the big boys to Florence.  They protested but we put our foots down and promised them I would not make them come home at any certain time, I wouldn't follow them around. I was their chaperone only.

It was actually a win-win situation for me--I didn't have to worry about the boys, and I got tons of free time to read and walk and just relax.
I dropped the boys off at the dunes around 11 am. I stayed in the parking lot, and like I said, I read, walked and relaxed until about 4pm, when the boys came off the dunes. Looking very hot, sandy and tired.  But, they had had a blast!  Lots of wipe outs and scrapes and bruises but all had smiles on their faces.

They decided they wanted to jump in the lake, to rinse off and cool down.
Here is a picture of the lake:

What this picture does not  show is the rec. center on the opposite side of the dock attached to the shore. There is a beach and a little hut where you can rent canoes and kayaks. It would be in the upper left side of the photo.

Derek decided he did not want to swim, he headed to the rest room to use the sink there to rinse. Jayce and Titus jumped in the lake. After about 5 min of jumping in and out of the water, they decided they wanted to swim from the dock at the shore, to the other side of the lake.

"No way, guys. It's too far."

"We can do it, it's not bad."

"I don't know..."

"We can. We'll go from here to the dock in the middle, rest, and then swim the rest of the way. Drive the van over and pick us up."

This last statement said as they swim away. While I had my doubts, water doesn't scare me, nor does it scare Jayce. 

I sigh and start to gather up all the discarded shoes and shirts and head up towards the van. I turn to watch Jayce and Titus get half way to the dock that's in the middle.

I hear a quiet "Help."

"What?!"

"Help, Mom!!"

"Not funny, Jayce!"

"No, I'm serious, Mom! Help!!"

"Crap" (actually I did not say "Crap" but I will not type what I said as I barely even speak the word I actually said)

"Help!!"

"Jayce!! What's going on?!!"

"Titus isn't going to make it. Mom, I can't help him! Mom!!"

About this time, Derek, comes meandering down from the restroom.

"Hey. What's to eat?"

"Help!!"

Derek looks at me, like, "Is this for real??". 
I quietly say, "Derek, I think we need you."

Now is the perfect time to tell you that my nephew, who played basketball, baseball and football since he was 5 years old, all through elementary school up until his Junior year of High School, and while he was good at those sports, he grew very bored with them.  Last year, someone convinced him to go out for the swim team. Since then, he has won numerous medals, and when he goes to college, he is going with a scholarship and swimming for the college swim team. Oh, and his summer job? Yeah, it's a lifeguard at the local pool.

Derek quickly takes off his shoes, shirt, and shorts and prepares to jump in.

He gives me one quick look to make sure this isn't some cruel prank and to make sure this is indeed happening.

"Go, Derek!"

Derek swims like a freaking dolphin and reaches Titus and has him quickly secured. He asks Jayce if he's okay and when Jayce says he is, Derek tells Jayce to swim  the rest of the way to the middle dock. Jayce does and quickly Derek arrives, dragging Titus with him. He gets Titus up out of the water, turns him on his side. Titus vomits.

While this was all  happening, I looked to the other side of the lake and saw the old men with their canoe shack. They heard and saw what was happening. But, like me, they weren't sure if it was serious or not.

Now that everyone was up on that middle dock, I quickly ran to the van and drove like a bat out of you know where to the other side of the lake. I ran down to the beach, where one old man was already in a canoe.
When he saw me, he asked if he should go out there. I said "Yes, please, they won't make it back."
So, off he goes.

Paddle
Paddle
Paddle
Paddle

It takes forever to get there as 1) it's a canoe 2) it's an old man.

While waiting , I ask the other man how often this happens, at this lake.
He said it's never happened before.
There are "Swim at Own Risk" and "No Lifeguard on Duty" signs everywhere. But, I was still shocked that this had not happened before.

Finally, the boat guy reached the dock. Jayce and Derek helped Titus into the canoe (with a life jacket on). Jayce jumped back into the water but clung to the canoe. Derek dove in and beat everyone back.

Once out of the water, Titus was very much in shock. He vomited again, his entire body shaking.

I ran up to the van, grabbed a towel.

And cried.  Hard.

About this time, my cell phone beeps that I have a text.
It's from Lisa, Titus' mom.
"How's everything going over there? ( :"

Crap.

"Okay! Just finishing up. Be home soon!"

We eventually got Titus into dry clothes.  We loaded up the van and headed back into town. The sandboard shop where we rented the boards was across town. As I drove, with Titus in the passenger seat, Derek and Jayce in the back, I could tell Titus was having a hard time.

Once at the shop, I send in Jayce and Derek to return all the boards. I ask Titus if he's okay.

Now, you've heard "My life passed before my eyes"?  Well, just because you're only 18, it doesn't mean your life has been meaningless. It doesn't mean you don't have regrets.  I will not tell you what Titus said, as I hold it dear and sacred that he told me. But, I will say, we were both sobbing by the time he was done.

Jayce and Derek come back to the van, I step out to call my husband and let him in on a little that has happened and explain that I want to hang out in town for a bit. I don't want to head back over the mountain, where I'll have no cell service and the nearest doctor is an hour away. Everyone was acting perfectly fine, just wanted to be certain.

As I hang up with my husband and turn towards the van, Titus is waiting for me.

He says "I want you to know, I would've tried to swim that far even if you would've said "No". It's not your fault. I wanted to do it so I did."

He knew. He knew that I felt extremely guilty for letting them swim out there like that. 

He tried his very hardest to convince me it wasn't my fault. And, I tried my very hardest to convince him I will always feel guilty.

I also expressed my fears about what his mother was going to say. My friend, the woman whose one fear is drowning. 

 Titus asked if we needed to tell her. 

"Ummmm....yeah. We do. There is no way I can look at her and NOT tell her. Plus, I will most certainly burst into tears as soon as I see her".  

We went to the local burger joint and ate dinner. There was lots of laughter and also, lots of "what ifs" that night. 

Have you ever heard that drowning is very quiet? I had, but never got it until that day. 

There were families all around us. Only myself, the boys and the two old men even had a clue what was going on, just feet away.  

There was no huge splashing and thrashing. 

Just a quiet "Help". 

One conversation we all had that night was if Derek had saved Titus', and on some level, Jayce's lives. 

I believe he did. 

 

Jayce could not help Titus as Titus is much larger and Jayce was very tired. I firmly believe Jayce would've died trying. 

I could've swam out there but certainly not fast enough and I'm certain I would not have had enough strength to swim dragging Titus. 

The old men would've never made it there in time. 

What if I hadn't have drove them that day? 

What if Derek hadn't of come down to the dock and instead went to the car, looking for food? 

When we finally made it home, I let Titus go in and tell his mother all that had happened. She came out and yes, I immediately started crying. She hugged me and said "I'm so glad you were there and it's okay." 

And, of course, she hugged Derek and said "Thank you!" 

It's been several weeks since this happened. I still cry. Hard. 

I still feel guilty. I always will. 

But, I'm okay with it. There's nothing wrong with a little guilt. 

I'd rather feel guilty with the results we do have instead of guilt for how it could've turned out. 

We did have some fun that day. This was taken after dinner, at BJs ice cream shop (I can guarantee you the boys felt good enough to giggle when I pulled into the parking lot). Derek, Jayce and Titus. With serious faces and not wanting to actually touch each other. 

It's a special kind of love. :) 

Post of Pictures

Summer is cooking right along. Here we are mid-July already, back to school ads in the paper this morning. Why do the days have to just fly??

Here's some photos of what's been happening.

Rock Springs, Wyoming. I went for 6 days, just myself and my folks. To see my brother get married!

This is my little brother, Lucas. Incase you cannot tell, he is smiling.  Which has been a rare occurrence, up until the last couple of years.

The reason my brother smiles way more these days.  He finally married Shelly. That is my father, standing up with Luke. And Shelly's friend, Jackie, standing up with her. They got married in their back yard. **Tangent** I'm a Bible believing Christian, but what kind of jack-A pastor would cancel on a couple two weeks before their wedding because the groom hasn't done something that most Christians haven't done? Ever? (for more info, you can ask in the comments)

Luke and Shelly with all of their children, Luke's two and her two. Oh, and the puppy, Trigger.

I came home to my very own fire pit in my very own backyard!!

Jeven's first fish of the summer!

Jarrett and Josie hate campfire smoke in their eyes. Their solution.

Judd helping Jeven fly his kite!

Kids are growing up. If you notice, no pictures included my oldest, Jayce. He's hardly ever home these days. Although, one major happening of the summer, a life changing one (seriously) included him. I hope to blog about it soon. (Cliff hanger, anyone?) 

Keep cool, everyone!!

Let's See If I Can Remember...

...how to write a blog post.

It's been awhile, folks, and, I wish I could give you all sorts of news but in reality, life is just moving right along.

Currently, we are all anxiously awaiting the end of school.  Parts of me are SO ready for schedules to become more relaxed and have more free time. Parts of me is dreading not having a schedule and too much free time.
We live in a cul-de-sac. There are two other households with children. And, I'd like to say that the kids just all play so nice together and everything is bliss. But, the other households don't run things the same way we do. Not even close. What those kids are allowed to watch, listen to, and even how they are allowed to treat other people is not something I can look past. So, we've had to reclaim the freedom we gave our kids and now they are limited to playing only with each other, and ignoring the kids in the neighborhood.  Boredom is going to be my worst enemy this summer. 

I've made some life style changes over the last 2 months. And, while the weight hasn't magically melted off, I'm starting to reap the rewards. I actually started jogging and was liking it. And, finally got to the point where I didn't feel like I was going to vomit on the sidewalk when my knee protested.
Yes, I started slow. I'm not talking about jogging miles here. More of a mixture of jogging/walking/heavy panting. But, I still ended up taking 2 weeks off of exercising and I was really bummed. And, sincerely. Not, "I will say I'm bummed because that sounds so healthy but secretly I'm enjoying the excuse that I do not have to move off the couch today" but really upset that I couldn't earn the extra calories I need to get my buttered popcorn when I watch reruns of "House". 
But, I think I can safely try again and concentrate of my form and stretching.
Turns out, I'm not 16 anymore. Or 26.  Or even 36. Gawd!!

My Grandma is back in her house. She is doing extremely well, much to my relief. Some updates were done to her house while she was gone and she is currently puttering around, making piles of stuff to get rid of, which is a huge accomplishment. I will be helping her with a garage sale next month.

My baby turns 8 next week. Another baby is down today with a sore throat.  My baby girl got her braces on and wants to know when she can start wearing makeup. My first baby spends most of his days out of the house, working in his lawn care job, saving for a truck. I'm deathly afraid he will indeed earn enough money to buy a truck and pay for his insurance and will continue to act responsibly so I will have no good answer as to why he cannot get his driver's license in December.  It's so hard to be proud and to let go at the same time.

Tomorrow, my husband and I will celebrate 17 years of marriage!!  Some days, it's flown by. Others? Not so much. ( :

There. It seems I do remember how to write a post, just sorry it wasn't more interesting.
But, summer is coming! Lots of potential for injuries, fake bbqs and opportunities to sleep in.
Ya just never know.

A Bag of Chips Never Looked So Good

This is my husband: 

Ok. Not really. But, there are similarities. Not the mustache (Much to my husband's dismay. He is not allowed facial hair at his job.) but the attitude. Like Ron, Judd doesn't say much, he doesn't like people. He considers chicken a vegetable (it doesn't have eye lashes), and the smell of bacon makes him happy.

But, when he does like you, he'll do anything for you. When he does say something, he means it. He is a man of his word and his word means something. 

He doesn't go out of his way to be social. He's not unfriendly, he just doesn't really care if he hangs out with people, let alone random strangers.

Imagine my surprise when he came home and announced we were going to a bbq at someone's house that I did not know.
Apparently, an old buddy has recently moved back into town and called Judd at work. Now, this buddy, Mark, has been to our house at different occasions, but it was to watch UFC fights and I couldn't instantly place his face.

But, it looked like we were going to a bbq on Sunday.

All throughout the week, I kept asking Judd questions, because I was so in shock that he had agreed to go.

Why are we going?? (Because he invited us)
Why? (I don't know....)
When was the last time you talked to him? Before this? (I don't know....two years ago??)
But,why does he invite us to a bbq after all this time? (I don't know...he was always kind of strange that way.)
Who else is going to be there? ( I don't know.)
What are we suppose to bring? (I don't know.)
Why are we going, again? (I DON'T KNOW!!!!)


So. We were going to a bbq at a stranger's house (pretty much!!) and had no idea who was going to be here. To say I was a little socially apprehensive would be an understatement.
Truthfully, I was a little resentful that something like this was going to take up my nap family time, plus, we were going to have to leave the kids behind with Jayce as we were unsure if it was a "family friendly" occasion.

Sunday afternoon rolls around. We rush home from church, feed the kids, set them up with bribes to be good fun activities.

We had decided that we would stop and at least get some chips and dip to take to the shindig. Now, because of our current economic state, our grocery money is not handed out willy nilly. We actually had already gone over our weekly budget so when I say it was a sacrifice, I'm not kidding! Yes, it was only chips and dip but....chips and dip for strangers!! (Basically)

Because we had gone to the store, we were running behind schedule. So, being the polite people we are, we called Mark and told him we hadn't forgotten and were on our way.

We pull up to his house and I immediately recognized him, much to my relief. But, there was a complete stranger outside with him. We walked in the house and met more strangers. All of them older people (not that it mattered, just I quickly realized I would not have much in common with them, seeing as how I'm a spring chicken and all). Two couples and one single lady introduced themselves.  We handed the hostess (Mark's girlfriend) our sacrificial chips and dip.

It was just.....awkward.   It just felt....off.  I didn't know quite what to do. I look at my husband and I can see he is struggling as well.

After the introductions, Mark says that he will start grilling the meat in about an hour.
Wha???  Great. There goes my entire afternoon.

Then.  Then I see the t.v.  Hooked up to a computer.

The single lady, that was trying so very hard to be funny and charming, starts talking and I realize what is happening. 

It is a sales pitch.

I look at my husband. Who will not make eye contact with me.

Mark looks at my husband and says "Oh boy. Judd is mad."

My husband, (remember, he says what he means and means what he says) says, "Yeah. Pretty much."

But, he sits down at the dining room table so I don't have much of a choice but sit down with him.
Now, all the other people are in the living room, with their backs to us.  However, Mark's two little dogs, are sitting on the back of the couch, facing us. I swear to all things Holy. They were laughing at us.

"You losers!"
"Suckers!!" 
"Neener neener!!"

I'm telling you, my heart was pounding so hard. Because, I was so mad, so unsure of what the heck to do.
I was unsure that, if I were to stand up and announce we had to leave, if my husband would follow me. After all, he had wanted to come in the first place.
I thought I could quietly text a friend and have them call me and fake an emergency.
But, people only do that on t.v!!! 

Meanwhile, the lady is trying to get her computer/t.v. to work. She announces that she can't find the presentation dvd.  And Mr. So-and-so will be here shortly and they will skip the dvd for now, and do that part when he gets here.

Now, this helps me realize that there will be a pause at some time and it wouldn't be too hard to make an excuse and leave. Because I'll be darned if I'm wasting my Sunday sitting there!!!  I say to myself I WILL get my husband's attention and we WILL leave.
Again, my heart is about to burst through my chest at the thought of having to make a scene shortly. So, I sit quietly, fluctuating between extreme anger (we called the guy to tell him we were going to be late, for god's sake!!) and wanting to giggle so badly because the dogs were truly laughing at us!!

Finally, I see a young man come up the drive-way. He enters the house, he's wearing a suit and tie that is about 3 sizes too big and just looks like....well, someone by husband would later make fun of. 

I think "Oh, there's NO WAY Judd will put up with this!!"

The boy man begins looking through his stuff to find his dvd and the lady tries to hand us some paperwork.

Now, here is where I fell in love with my husband all over again. 

He stands up, announces we are leaving. 

Walks in to the kitchen and grabs our chips and dips!!! 

Mark says "Oh, you're taking that back?"
"Yup". 

Out we go.
Mark follows us.

Once outside, he apologizes up one side and down the other. He explained he'd been out of work, this was a way to make some income and the lady told him to invite anyone he could think of (us? really??) but NOT to tell them what it was about.
Which, he now realizes was a mistake.

My husband's response?  "Yeah. Pretty much." 

But, of course, Judd understands about having to make an income. And, he even understands about how pushy the sales people can be and how they operate.

By the time we got in our van to leave, Judd had told Mark that of course he was available to go hunting, shooting, fishing any time. And, they shook hands and all was well. (I'm told Mark actually came to my husband's work today, Tuesday, and apologized again)

I was silent for the first 10 minutes after we had finally gotten the heck out of there. 
Then, the giggles I'd been holding back finally released themselves.

"Judd? When a long lost buddy calls you up out of the blue and asks you to come to his house for some food, what are you going to say?? " 

"I will ask:  What are you selling?" 

He said he felt like such a dope.
And, I said: 
"Yeah....but you took the chips back and TOTALLY redeemed yourself!!" 

Truth Is Thursday

Truth is.......today is my birthday!!

Truth is....... I've been saying I'm 39 for about 4 months now, (it's easier than saying I'm 38 and a half) that I actually thought I was turning 40 up until a few weeks ago!!

Truth is......I was SO happy I wasn't!!

Truth is......the fact that I didn't know how old I truly was means I'm getting old.

Truth is.....I feel I need to make this next year count, as it's sort of a "bonus" year.

Truth is......in order to do that, I need to get off my arse and make things happen. 

Truth is......that's easier said than done. But, I said it. And, now I will do it!!