Saturday, February 22, 2014

Where the Insane People Live

 I sit here tonight, crouched at the kitchen table, trying to look invisible as it seems I can do nothing without being interrupted or asked "what are you doing?".  Not that this is anything unusual, I've been a mom for 15 years, I know the drill. But, I realized this evening, it has been since before I quit my job, in October, that I've had any significant time to myself. I especially like when I'm home by myself. But, I haven't been home alone for ages. I am in need, that's for sure!!

My grandma ended up being admitted to the hospital and was there for about a week. She then went to a rehab facility. And, here is where I am thankful for my year working at the assisted living facility and my years of volunteering at other facilities. We, as her family, were given the choice of which facility to place my grandma in.  I immediately ruled out several and encouraged my mother to pick the one that Judd's grandma had wonderful experiences with and several of "my" residents went to and returned good as new.
Of course, you take a 83 year old woman who has lived on her own for 30 years, and put her in a place where she can't do her own medications or even use the toilet without assistance and you get a rough trip.
But, she slowly regained some of her strength and eventually was discharged.  She then flew with my aunt and uncle to Alaska and she will stay up there for a bit, while her house is updated to be a safer environment for her.  I'm sad to have her so far away but M&D have no easy task ahead of them.

My aunt and uncle (who I mentioned in the previous post, not in the paragraph above)  needed some help as well, this last month. My uncle required surgery and my aunt does not drive. So, I drove them back and forth to the hospital for several days (him just once, her back and forth to visit and eventually him when he was released) and while the 120 miles a day (yup) were alot, I spent some time with my aunt that I've been related to for almost 40 years (GAWD!!) but only just got to know a few weeks ago, thru the conversations in the waiting rooms, in the car and sitting quietly by my uncle's bed.  Seems she remembers many funny things about my childhood, and has very strong opinions about many things. It was interesting talks, for sure. 

Jarrett is half way thru his basketball season. And, we have decided this will be the last sport we participate in.  We just are not sports people. We could care less, we have many other things going on, we don't have the time to shuffle back and forth to a million practices a week, taking up entire weekends with games. And, the older the kids get,the more competitive the sports become. And, honestly, our kids don't show signs of hiding exceptional athletic ability.  And, being honest again, team sports are rarely about playing as a team. If you're lucky, you will get a coach that attempts to make it appear he's trying to teach them to play as a team. But, more often than not, it's about one or two exceptional kids who hog the ball, out score everyone, all while their parents cheer them on, not caring about anything else but winning. (No, I'm not bitter, why do you ask??)  My kids just want to have fun and wear cool shoes. And, get snacks. So, while they may protest, at first, when we tell them no more sports, I think they will in the long run, be okay.

We sold my husband's Samurai and we are hoping that will take the edge off of our financial stress. We are really trying to avoid me having to go back to work.  But, if I do, I imagine getting my old job back won't be a problem. My "wonderful" boss, that appreciated his employees like one appreciates a zit on their backside, "moved on to other things" most suddenly. I hear that the whole dining room full of senior citizens stood up and cheered the day he left.  

I tell ya, being a grown up is sometimes not everything I dreamed it would be. Sometimes, it's much much worse. But, sometimes, you get your almost 8 year old asking you: "Mom? I have a "Yes" or "No" question. Actually, it's just a "Yes" question. Can I have some soda?"  And, if I don't make a point to concentrate on him, on all of the people I love, big or little, grandmother, aunt, neighbor, check out clerk at the grocery store, I miss the funny things, I miss the intelligence that I thought was missing, the random kind things people do for other people, the random things I can do for strangers, if I don't stop to appreciate the little things that make me smile (like the obvious answer to Jeven's question), I would surely go insane.  And, I've seen where they put insane people, I don't want to go there!   

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