Thursday, September 26, 2013

Walking After Midnight

Sleepwalking is not like it is depicted in the movies. Arms out, chanting, roaming the streets. Wait. Maybe that's zombies. Which is all the rage these days, much to my disgust.

Anyways....sleepwalking can be quite funny, if done correctly and safely. 

My brother did it often. Once, we all (dad,mom and myself) watched my brother, perhaps he was 8, go down the front steps and climb into my father's big Ford pick up and pretend to drive. All while sound asleep. We lived out in the country and after witnessing this latest trick, my parents started to roll the portable dishwasher in front of the front door so he wouldn't roam off into the wilderness at night. 
My mother also worried some when Luke was in the Navy and out to sea. A Navy ship is not something you want to sleepwalk off of. 

I have done a few episodes myself. During the summer after high school graduation, I worked all day and hung out with my friends until the wee hours of the morning. I would often times wake up shortly after going to bed and be so confused that I would think I was late for work. Therefore, I would frantically try to find my clothes, do my hair and be completely dressed for work only to realize it was 5am and not 10am. Then, I'd go back to bed. Still dressed for work.

Shortly after my husband and I were married, I awoke in the middle of the night to see a man standing at the foot of our bed. I can, to this day, tell you what he was wearing and what he looked like. I woke up my husband and told him about the man in our room. He quickly turned on the light to find...nobody. I calmly went back to sleep. My poor husband, however, laid there, heart pounding and very alert, for a very long time.

To this day, when I get extremely tired or stressed, I do these weird things in my sleep. And, I can totally remember them the next day. The what I did and also,the reason why I did them. The episodes mainly revolve around work and thinking I am there instead of home, in my bed. I have roamed the house, looking for the time clock. I have tried to communicate with co-workers on my walkie talkie. My husband has gotten used to it and just rolls over and goes back to sleep. And, makes fun of me in the morning.

Just recently, while my oldest son and his friend were staying up all night, playing video games in the living room, I got up, went into the kitchen and opened a bag of Cheetos and proceeded to munch away. My son recognized my actions as my sleepwalking fun-time and calmly took the snack away and told me to go back to bed. His best friend thought it was hilarious and went home and told the story to his mother who also happens to be our Pastor's wife. Now, at any church picnic or function, if there are cheese puffs, she teases me horribly. 

Hey, you don't have to be completely asleep to enjoy Cheetos, am I right?

 My children have inherited their mother's habits. When Josie sleepwalks, she is looking for the restroom. She has pee'd on a kitchen chair, in the living room and once in the bathroom sink. Unlike her mother, she remembers nothing the next day.

My absolute favorite sleepwalking story involves my oldest son. It was this past summer, around the 4th of July.

He told me the story the morning after he did it as he DOES remember after he sleepwalks.
He was dreaming of lighting firecrackers and smoke bombs, in his bedroom. He would light the fuse, throw the bomb under his brother's bunkbeds. In reality, he was throwing his various blankets and pillows onto the floor.
One firecracker, in his dream, was HUGE. He just knew it was going to be dangerous but he lit it anyways and immediately regretted it. He knew there was no time to save everyone, so he saved himself.
He ran down the hallway, and crouched down in the corner, by the garage door, in the kitchen and plugged his ears. He felt horrible that he wasn't able to alert anyone else in the house about the impending explosion. He waited and waited and waited. But, nothing exploded. With a sigh of relief, he went back to bed.
And awoke the next morning with no pillows or blankets on his bed.

I couldn't believe that he went through that turmoil and we all slept peacefully in our beds. And, I still laugh today, picturing him crouched in the kitchen, with his fingers in his ears with a look of panic on his face.  
And, I try not to be concerned that he thought it was normal to light firecrackers in his bedroom.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Whip It Good

Jeven HATES to get up in the mornings. I literally have to drag him out of bed. Kicking and yelling and fighting me every step of the way. At least on school mornings. On weekends? Up 30 min EARLIER than a school morning. Yup. It's grand.

After one especially exasperating morning, when I stated I didn't know what we were gonna do with him, Jeven offered up this suggestion:

Jeven: I know what you can do!
Me: Oh yeah? What?
Jeven: Buy a big thing of licorice!
Me: Wha??
Jeven: Yeah!! You can spank me with the long strings of Red Rope!
Me: Oh? And, then what? Let you eat it?
Jeven: Yeah!! THAT would be my punishment!! Eating licorice that touched my bottom!!! 

I don't know what to type here, as I wasn't sure what to say in response to his whole plan. I think I just told him to get his shoes on and get out to the bus stop. 

For the record, we don't not whip our children with ropes, Red or otherwise.

He does love licorice! And, he chooses black as only 1/3 of the people in our house will eat it. (2/6 really but, that is not a lowest term fraction, and it bothered me.)

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Falling In Line

Did you hear that? That huge **sigh**?  That was me.  Sighing with relief that the cooler weather, routines and Sunday afternoons watching football have returned. 

Spring has always been my favorite season but, I do think Fall is coming close behind.

Jarrett and Jeven returned to elementary school, in 3rd and 2nd grades. Jeven has a teacher that we know well and have been very happy with. Jarrett actually has two teachers as they job share but they've been there for a long time and I've heard great things about both of them.

Still trying to figure out why Jeven states, often, that he "hates school" and get to the bottom of that. His teacher and I are communicating back and forth and so far, no huge alarms are going off. I honestly think he just wants to stay home and be lazy. Who doesn't, right?

Jayce is a freshman in the online school and doing very well. He is in 2 honors classes, Literature and Geometry. We both were a little nervous as I have NO TEACHER'S MATERIALS so really no way (other than my natural geniusness. Wha?? That's not a word? Should be.) to help him or check things before he turns them in. You know, kinda like High School. Anyways, he has an "A" in each course with the exception of an 89.9% in Literature. We'll take it!!

Josie started 5th grade, in the online school as well. And, she's doing pretty well, too. She is doing much more on her own and not needing me right beside her with every. single. worksheet/lesson. Which is good as Pinning dishes, laundry, and cooking do not do themselves.

The "evil lady" is still at my work. And, while I've accepted it and have learned to cope, it's still a challenge, to say the least. But, her health has deteriorated, even more so than previously, so I'm not sure how her story will end.

I leave for work, 4 days a week, approximately 3 min. before the little boys get off the school bus. It's difficult, as I see them for a few min. in the morning then not again until the next morning. But, we're getting into a groove.  I do have Wednesdays, Saturdays and Sundays off. While Wednesdays and Sundays are packed full with church activities, Saturdays are basically our "free" days. And while I try to cram as much free/chore/fun/relax/nap time into one weekend, and take advantage of being with the kids, because I miss them so during the week, by the time 7:30 comes around Sunday evening, I'm wiped.
Just because my kids aren't toddlers nor in diapers anymore doesn't mean they can't exhaust me to the ground!

As I'm typing, the kids are in bed, the dishes are done, packpacks (what we call backpacks) are, well, packed, laundry is neatly folded at least out of the dryer and in a communal basket. I have a Pumpkin Spice wax warmer going and I'm just ....content. 

For some reason, with the entrance of Fall, I just feel like things have fallen in line 

Although, I'm no fool. I know the reality of raining, cold days will start to drive me slightly insane and also make the kids stir crazy and the holidays are fast approaching and my cloud of Pumpking Spice will soon give me a headache, I'm gonna bask in contentment for awhile M'kay?