Monday, January 11, 2010

Parking Idiots

Dear Other Person That Is Going Into The Same Establishment As Myself And My Four Children,

I know you see me unloading my four children out of our mini-van.  I know you think we are having such a fantastic time.  I know you see my children running around the parking lot like hooligans and think to yourself: "I just have to be part of that!". 
I also know that your best solution to that is to park right beside us.  Even though there are about 107 other parking spaces open around you. 
And, by "right beside us" I mean within inches of our van. 

I understand you are just trying to be friendly.  And maybe, perhaps, you're one of those "people persons" and you probably also will be standing up against me in the check out line. 

But.  Seriously?  I am only a mother.  Taking 4 children into a public place.  My patience only goes so far. 

Take this as my fair warning to you:  If you continue to park 3 inches from us, while there are many other open spaces available to you, I will not stop my children from doing any of the following:
  • hitting your car with our door
  • putting their gum on your mirror
  • actually opening your door to pet your dog
  • drawing "Josie is dumb" on your windshield
  • taking a rare, limited edition Littlest Pet Shop and letting it ride on your hood
If you come out to find any of those things, well, you know?  I warned you. 

A Mother Of Four, Frustrated With Parking Idiots


  1. Hey, maybe your parking idiot is related to our Japanese stalker who drives a scooter??

    Have a great day.

  2. Do you really let thing like this get to you? I just laughed! Sorry!

  3. Shari,
    It does bother me!! I have personal space issues anyways then you get me trying to get something accomplished like grocery shopping, and keeping my kids safe, etc. and some idiot is right up against me, either bodily or parking, it just annoys me!!
    I know I'm cool but come on!!!! Do you have to be right up against me?!!! ( :

  4. I agree you are cool! I only have three and hardly make it some days. You have one added to your troops! :)

  5. I did a post when I first started my blog about moms needing bigger parking spaces. I had a poll and everything. Everyone thought it was a good idea.
    That post is here.


  6. I wonder if that letter is too long to go on a bumper sticker.

  7. I have personal space issues, too. Mostly with 'close talkers', but 'close parkers' bother me, too. Especially when they leave me 4" to get a body my size into the car! LOL

  8. Why do people do this, park so close to you that you can't open your door...or even come sit right on your damn lap at the movies....This mother and her 4 kids sat right next to us last week in the front row...when the rest of the cinema was empty and then she got miffed when I wouldn't take my bag off the chair so she could sit cheek to cheek..meh!


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