Monday, August 23, 2010

Womanhood

Sometimes, I really, really hate being a woman. 

Yes, I'm thankful I got to bear children.  And breastfeed.  And, I guess I'm glad we act with emotion before logic.  And, I hate the thought of having to scratch myself in places that shouldn't be scratched in public, such as men do.

But, right now, I'm hating womanhood. 

Ya'll know what I'm talking about here. 

We just got back from a wonderful, family camping trip and I have lots of pictures to share and stories to tell. But, I can't gather up enough gumption to say anything witty.

Every month, it drags me deeper and deeper into such an emotional hell, I swear it's the worst it's ever been, every month.
I have no energy, I eat everything in sight, which is seriously detrimental to the weight loss I've accrued so far.  I have no patience left for my family or others that I love.

I basically turn into someone I hate, that I don't recognize. 

Then, the real fun begins.  My emotions start to get back under control, then physically, (TMI alert!!) I bleed so much, I can't leave the house, or literally, move much at all. 

I've talked to my doctor about a surgery, to get things under control but because we don't have an extra 8 grand laying around,(that's AFTER insurance!), we won't be doing that anytime soon. 

So, excuse while I bestow my anger and moodiness onto you. 
It will pass. I hope.

7 comments:

  1. I wish I could do something to help.

    Try to rest as much as having four kids and a husband and a house will let you.

    Oh. I guess you can't really rest.

    ((hugs))?

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  2. Wandering by from Ami's blog. Have you tried Wild Yam cream( it is a natural progesterone cream) I started using it about 2 years ago and wow! what a difference , no cramping , no "flooding " far less irritable all the first month. You can buy it at teh health food store or online Progesterone

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  3. ***Disclaimer - this whole reply is TMI...

    Oh, Sista - I hear you! It's miserable!!!I used to get cramps so bad that I would throw up and pass out practically every month. It was b.a.d. Luckily after having kids it toned down a bit, but not the emotional ups and downs - those are still in full-swing. The one thing that has helped (TONS) with the physical part is the birth control I'm on. I know not everyone "believes in" IUD's (totally understandable) but it's literally my only option (I have a blood clot disorder and Merina has such low levels of hormone that it doesn't raise the risk of blood clots) and it's been great! My "monthlys" are so slight now, I love it(well - I don't love "it" but you know what I mean)! (And yes, we tried the old fashioned condoms - and now we have Jack.)

    Anyway, I SO understand the emotional frustration (and so does Jeff, lol). It's NOT FUN at all. You're right, it will pass and it's never soon enough. Hang in there, friend.

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  4. I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this.
    Try taking something for your liver like Himalaya's Liver Care, Milk Thistle or something for your adrenals.

    Your hormones are made in your liver.

    Hugs and love,
    T

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  5. Sorry people! Hormones are NOT made in the liver. Your adrenals do your hormones aside from your pituitary gland.

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  6. "Dietary proteins are sent to the liver, where they are converted by special enzymes into usable body proteins such as hormones."

    This quote was taken from a medical website, one of many I found stating the importance of the liver in hormone production. Anonymous, I would love to hear where you're getting your info! And, your name. ( :

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  7. I'm so sorry. If it helps...I know exactly what you're going through. I recently had surgery to take care of it myself. I hope you're able to figure out something soon.

    :::hugs:::

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