Animals Are Awesome

Remember that itty bitty tiny puppy we got last year? He has grown a tad.

With all the things that come with owning a dog--hair, fleas, hair, slobber, hair, poop, hair, vet bills, hair and food (oh, the dog hair? yeah, it's everywhere. every where)--they still manage to weasel their way into your hearts and quickly become part of the family. Luther is a big dope with a heart of a marshmallow. He loves to be with his family, never hurts anyone (on purpose. he does step on our toes alot.) and has really been the perfect family dog, for us. That doesn't mean that I don't get frustrated and question what in the world we were thinking, getting another dog, especially one so..large. But, he belongs with us.

Friday nights are super crazy at my work. Lots of showers and people leaving for the weekend and such. One Friday night, a few weeks ago, I was sweating like a pig, running around doing all the things I do. It was 915 and I hadn't clocked out for dinner yet (I get off at 10) and it didn't look like I was going to be able to. I was also training a new girl. It was just super stressful.
My cell phone rings and I see it is my home. I answered, thinking it would be my husband putting in his request for Sonic or some other treat, on my way home.
"Hello!!" (said impatiently)
"Mom??? (It's Josie)
"Josie??" (my heart immediately started beating 1000 beats a second)
"Mom!! SOBSOBSOBSOBSOBSOBSOBCRYCRYCRYWAILLUTHERRANAWAYSOBSOBCRYCRYWAIL"
"What? Where is your dad?" (I knew Jayce was not home)
"HELEFTUSHEREALONE!!CRYCRYCRYGARBLEYGOOKTHATICANTUNDERSTAND"

At this point, all I could understand was the dog was gone, my husband had left the kids alone,at 915 at night, and my daughter was besides herself with terror/guilt.  I was needed at home and I was at work and helpless to do anything about it. It was the worst feeling in the world. I finally managed to leave work (a whole 10 min. before my shift ended) and I rushed home, also looking along the road for signs of our missing dog.

I get home, expecting all heck to be on the loose, to find my daughter happily watching t.v., the boys playing with their Legos and my husband asking "Did you bring me home anything?".
Oh, and I was also greeted by the dog.

The story was told to me in bits and pieces.
The short version is: The kids left the gate open, the dog went out into the night, it was awhile before anyone noticed that the dog wasn't around (it was when they were eating dinner and he wasn't up in their business). Judd was angry, Josie was scared. Judd literally went around the corner to find our dog on someone's couch, looking out their front window. ("Hiya Dad!! I went on an adventure!!")  The owners of the house were not home so my husband decided to camp out on their front porch to wait. He tells me it was because he didn't want to drive ALL the way home (seriously, it's like less than 300 yds ) but when further pushed, he finally confessed it was because he was afraid the neighbors were dognapping his beloved pooch.
Luther made it home safe and sound, the kids will NEVER leave the gate open again, I suffered a mild heart attack.

Just another Friday night.

It has been one week, today, that we lost our beloved black kitty. She was 13 years old. Judd surprised me with her, just a itty bitty kitty, shortly after I suffered my miscarriage in 2000. She has been a constant in our house for many years. She was a tough cookie kitty. We came home from church to find her in the road. It was all very sad and not to be too dramatic over a cat, I've missed her this week.

And, last but certainly not least, is this:

Because? It is totally sane and logical to bring home a newly hatched duck and introduce it to your dog, your other cat and your children.

Do not question my judgement.

Summer Lackage

This summer has really, for a lack of a better word, well, lacked.

I know you would think since I haven't written in awhile, it must be because I'm off doing really awesome things.
I haven't been.

Let's see...........

My husband is still constantly looking for another job. One that pays ALL the bills and maybe would give us some breathing room. Or even one that has potential for promotions. The one he has now, he has topped out unless we want to move out of state for management position. And have him work 70+ hours a week. Which we do not want.
Anyways, he actually had an interview last week and it sounded very promising. The man even went as far as to tell my husband that he would send us an employee benefit package. 
A week later, we still haven't gotten it. My husband called and was told the position had already been filled. (And, not by my husband, incase you needed further explanation.)
It's all very discouraging.

The abusive resident is still at my work. We have been told no fewer than THREE times that if she was not out by three different dates, the police would be called. It has not happened and I've given up hope that it ever will. Seems assisted living facilities, among many other facilities, are motivated by one thing--money. Don't even get me started on that whole issue. (more money=better care for seniors/children???)

We did manage to go to the coast two different days, as a family. I've arranged numerous playdates and sleepovers for the kids. I've done, what I consider, a heartfelt attempt at making things fun for my kids.
And how do they repay me?
By fighting non-stop and complaining.  Yes, I know. Kids fight. They complain. They are ungrateful. I get that. And while I resolve, everyday, to do a better job parenting so that I will have grateful kids that show love and respect towards their siblings, and others, I am also a realist. And I remember how I treated my brother, whom I love and respect very much. It wasn't pretty. Or kind.

But, my whole point here, when confronted and asked why such behavior is constantly happening, my kids respond with, "I just don't like you working."

At first, it was huge guilt overload. But, I've been working a year now. And, while it has been an adjustment, it has been very livable and has afforded us opportunities we wouldn't get if I didn't work (coast trips, to name one!).

Finally, after one horrible day of yelling and crying, I sat the kids down and said my working would no longer be an excuse to act disrespectful and I would no longer try to compensate by letting them get away with everything. I explained trying to make me feel guilty would no longer work!! I could see Josie, who is the HUGEST instigator in the "Let's make mom feel guilty" exploitations, admit defeat and her and I made eye contact and she was feeling me. 

Since then, things have been better. But, I will be honest. I'm looking forward to summer being over. We are in need of some more structure, some routine. Even our eating habits have been out of whack. And while I could try to redirect some of the routines and diets, I just feel like the end of summer will be the start of some many things. Good things.

I know that my last few (okay, you caught me, ONE) posts have been pretty much "my life is hard" theme, I am working on getting some pictures posted and some more lighthearted posts. (I saw that Karey!!!  You just rolled your eyes, didn't you?Because you're thinking "I've heard THAT before?" AmIright???)

Who knows? Maybe the end of summer will mean me posting more. Anything is possible!